Rose – Forwarded by Rose (Jigna Jain )

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The first day of school our professor introduced himself and challenged us to get to know someone we didn’t already know. I stood up to look around when a gentle hand touched my shoulder.
I turned around to find a wrinkled, little old lady beaming up at me with a smile that lit up her entire being.
She said, “Hi handsome. My name is Rose. I’m eighty-seven years old. Can I give you a hug?”
I laughed and enthusiastically responded, “Of course you may!” and she gave me a giant squeeze.
“Why are you in college at such a young, innocent age?” I asked.
She jokingly replied, “I’m here to meet a rich husband, get married, and have a couple of kids…”
“No seriously,” I asked. I was curious what may have motivated her to be taking on this challenge at her age.
“I always dreamed of having a college education and now I’m getting one!” she told me.
After class we walked to the student union building and shared a chocolate milkshake.
We became instant friends. Every day for the next three months we would leave class together and talk nonstop. I was always mesmerized listening to this “time machine” as she shared her wisdom and experience with me.
Over the course of the year, Rose became a campus icon and she easily made friends wherever she went. She loved to dress up and she reveled in the attention bestowed upon her from the other students. She was living it up..
At the end of the semester we invited Rose to speak at our football banquet. I’ll never forget what she taught us. She was introduced and stepped up to the podium. As she began to deliver her prepared speech, she dropped her three by five cards on the floor.
Frustrated and a little embarrassed she leaned into the microphone and simply said, “I’m sorry I’m so jittery. I gave up beer for Lent and this whiskey is killing me! I’ll never get my speech back in order so let me just tell you what I know.”
As we laughed she cleared her throat and began, “We do not stop playing because we are old; we grow old because we stop playing.
There are only four secrets to staying young, being happy, and achieving success.
You have to laugh and find humor every day.
You’ve got to have a dream. When you lose your dreams, you die.
We have so many people walking around who are dead and don’t even know it!
There is a huge difference between growing older and growing up.
If you are nineteen years old and lie in bed for one full year and don’t do one productive thing, you will turn twenty years old. If I am eighty -seven years old and stay in bed for a year and never do anything I will turn eighty-eight.
Anybody can grow older. That doesn’t take any talent or ability. The idea is to grow up by always finding opportunity in change. Have no regrets.
The elderly usually don’t have regrets for what we did, but rather for things we did not do. The only people who fear death are those with regrets.”
She concluded her speech by courageously singing “The Rose”
She challenged each of us to study the lyrics and live them out in our daily lives. At the year’s end Rose finished the college degree she had begun all those years ago.
One week after graduation Rose died peacefully in her sleep.
Over two thousand college students attended her funeral in tribute to the wonderful woman who taught by example that it’s never too late to be all you can possibly be.
When you finish reading this, please send this peaceful word of advice to your friends and family, they’ll really enjoy it!
These words have been passed along in loving memory of ROSE.
REMEMBER, GROWING OLDER IS MANDATORY.
GROWING UP IS OPTIONAL.

We make a Living by what we get,
We make a Life by what we give.

God promises a safe landing, not a calm passage.
If God brings you to it, He will bring you through it.
“Good friends are like stars………You don’t always see them, but you know they are always there.


” COURAGE TO KNOW “.

Can any one explain… – Thoughts forwarded by Mr. Vijay Kumar Baljepalli

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1.If all the nations in the world are in debt(am not

joking. even US has got debts), where did all the money go? (weird)
2.When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests
it? (to be given a thought)
3.What is the speed of darkness? (absurd)
4.If the “black box” flight recorder is never damaged
during a plane crash, why isn’t the whole airplane made out of that
stuff? (very good thinking)
5.Who copyrighted the copyright symbol? (who knows)
6.Can you cry under water? (let me try)
7.Why do people say, “you’ve been working like a dog”
when dogs just sit around all day? (i think they meant something
else)
8.Why are the numbers on a calculator and a phone
reversed? (God knows)
9.Do fish ever get thirsty? (let me ask and tell)
10.Can you get cornered in a round room? (by ones
eyes)
12.Why do birds not fall out of trees when they sleep?
(tonight i will stay and watch)
13.What came first, the fruit or the color orange?
(seed)
14.If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is
made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from? (No
comments)
15.What should one call a male ladybird? (No comments)
16.If a person suffered from amnesia and then was
cured would they remember that they forgot? (can somebody help )
17.Can you blow a balloon up under water? (yes u can)
18.Why is it called a “building” when it is already
built? (strange isn’t it)
19.If you were traveling at the speed of sound and you
turned on your radio would you be ! able to hear it? (got to think
scientifically)
20.If you’re traveling at the speed of light and you
turn your headlights on, what happens?  (
Einstein shud have answered this. Check out his theories of relativity !)  
21.Why is it called a TV set when theres only one?
(very nice)
22.If a person owns a piece of land do they own it all
the way down to the core of the earth? (this is nice)
23.Why do most cars have speedometers that go up to at
least 130 when you legally can’t go that fast on any road? (stupid,
break the law)
24. If drink & drive is not allowed why the hell they
have parking in Bars ? ( Good Question )

Awesome reply: What should I do to marry a rich guy?

No clue No Comments »

Pretty’s Love letter

A young and pretty lady posted this on a popular forum:

I’m going to be honest of what I’m going to say here. I’m 25 this year. I’m very pretty, have style and good taste. I wish to marry a guy with $500k annual salary or above. You might say that I’m greedy, but an annual salary of $1M is considered only as middle class in New York . My requirement is not high. Is there anyone in this forum who has an income of $500k annual salary? Are you all married? I wanted to ask: what should I do to marry rich persons like you? Among those I’ve dated, the richest is $250k annual income, and it seems that this is my upper limit. If someone is going to move into high cost residential area on the west of New York City Garden ( ? ) , $250k annual income is not enough.

I’m here humbly to ask a few questions:
1) Where do most rich bachelors hang out? (Please list down the names and addresses of bars, restaurant, gym)
2) Which age group should I target?
3) Why most wives of the riches is only average-looking? I’ve met a few girls who doesn’t have looks and are not interesting, but they are able to marry rich guys
4) How do you decide who can be your wife, and who can only be your girlfriend? (my target now is to get married)

Awesome reply:

Dear Ms. Pretty,

I have read your post with great interest. Guess there are lots of girls out there who have similar questions like yours. Please allow me to analyse your situation as a professional investor. My annual income is more than $500k, which meets your requirement, so I hope everyone believes that I’m not wasting time here. From the standpoint of a business person, it is a bad decision to marry you. The answer is very simple, so let me explain. Put the details aside, what you’re trying to do is an exchange of “beauty” and “money”: Person A provides beauty, and Person B pays for it, fair and square. However, there’s a deadly problem here, your beauty will fade, but my money will not be gone without any good reason. The fact is, my income might increase from year to year, but you can’t be prettier year after year. Hence from the viewpoint of economics, I am an appreciation asset, and you are a depreciation asset. It’s not just normal depreciation, but exponential depreciation. If that is your only asset, your value will be much worried 10 years later.

By the terms we use in Wall Street, every trading has a position, dating with you is also a “trading position”. If the trade value dropped we will sell it and it is not a good idea to keep it for long term - same
goes with the marriage that you wanted. It might be cruel to say this, but in order to make a wiser decision any assets with great depreciation value will be sold or “leased”. Anyone with over $500k annual income is not a fool; we would only date you, but will not marry you. I would advice that you forget looking for any clues to marry a rich guy. And by the way, you could make yourself to become a rich person with $500k annual income. This has better chance than finding a rich fool.

Rabba Ho Ho Ho HO… Clueless and Co Co Co Co Co

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Hellooooooooooo Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii !!! ( Well I got so excited in telling hi to you guys!)

Suno Suno duniya ke log, Sabse bada hai Clueless and Co…

Well, long time so I thought I would send a mail to remind everyone that you all our a part of clueless and Co ( Yeah i understand that there no subscriptions to remind you that you are part of this great group)

Well may I take the pleasure to annouce that Vijay and MRs Vijay are getting married to each other. Well no points to guess who Mrs Vijay is .. Its me, myseslf, cutie pie sweetie pie, angel, awesome Vivina!! Well the wedding is on the 19th April, 2008. Mark your diary and do make good arrangements to come to Hyd on 18 itself. Please try your best to come, if not possible the least is expected that you send the marriage gifts ;)

Ok the next big news is that…..oh sorry there is nothing ! People are getting so busy.. I mean our clueless and co star Ms Preeti is very busy. There are very few forwards now a days. Preeti May God keep you so busy always!… Well I can see the entire clueless and co lifting their right hand and saying Ameen :).

Murali Alias Versatile World: Well the biggest update that he and his bike got a year older this March. No suprises for the bike. it still has no name and identity.. It still waiting to be registered.. Murali is 28 years old now.. Oh look that way, Murali is still in his twenties man.. and one of the bachelors waiting to get married.. Murali do get married before its too late. Hail Versatile World!( well this is free advertising on my part to promote VW and make the name familiar if not popular)

Smitha : One of the eligible spinisters in our group.. Not sure about you, but everybody else is waiting when you will get married. Well I am not sure what she learned in her new job…but yes I can tell you that she learnt how to cook rice without a cooker in Pune! Pune will be remembered for this remarkable achievement of hers :)

Sorry Sudha, I am not writing about you. If i tell that you are still in Satyam, All clueless and co people would pounce on my to give the same stale news about you everytime.

Kireeti : Well this is to announce that Kireeti has written TOEFL exam. Dont be suprised if he speaks only in English to you ;) You ses he talks English walk English sleeps english eats english…so that English goes to the grave nxt to Shakespeare’s..Also his results would be out in mid April. Its bad manners to ask somebody about his/ her results of an examination.. So please remember this.

Bijeta: Well we had an awesome superb time on her wedding anniversary which was on 19th feb( am I right) Anniversary gift by Vijay was one big beautiful flower ( well it was a cauliflower ;) Which later Vijay took it back to be cooked for next day’s lunch!

Satti Pandu finally got the pandu(fruit in Telugu) for all his efforts of hard work( not sure whether it was hard work at work or hard work at muskafying the boss…yeah he is flying to Boston. Anybody wants anything from Boston, Do send it to me I shall edit it and forward the same to Satti Pandu

Praveen : Well Praveen has shaved off his beard… it was as shocking and exciting as Himesh Reshamiya taking of his cap for an award function.. try to get some photos of the new praveen.. The first photo will get a cash prize of Rs 10k from Praveen!

I guess the next occasion where most of us can meet is my wedding, so please make sure that you hit, bang bash, punch Murali for still not sharing all the photos of Vizag Trip..I would not mind joining you guys even though it has to be in the midst of the wedding ceremony!

Take care.. and do keep in touch…..

Vivina.

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